Tuesday, January 24, 2006

Daniel Bedingfield - If You're Not The One

If you’re not the one then why does my soul feel glad today?
If you’re not the one then why does my hand fit yours this way?
If you are not mine then why does your heart return my call
If you are not mine would I have the strength to stand at all
I never know what the future brings
But I know you are here with me now
We’ll make it through
And I hope you are the one I share my life with
I don’t want to run away but I can’t take it, I don’t understand
If I’m not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am?
Is there any way that I can stay in your arms?
If I don’t need you then why am I crying on my bed?
If I don’t need you then why does your name resound in my head?
If you’re not for me then why does this distance maim my life?
If you’re not for me then why do I dream of you as my wife?
I don’t know why you’re so far away
But I know that this much is true
We’ll make it through
And I hope you are the one I share my life with
And I wish that you could be the one I die with
And I pray in you’re the one I build my home with
I hope I love you all my life
I don’t want to run away but I can’t take it, I don’t understand
If I’m not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am
Is there any way that I can stay in your arms?
‘Cause I miss you, body and soul so strong that it takes my breath away
And I breathe you into my heart and pray for the strength to stand today
‘Cause I love you, whether it’s wrong or right
And though I can’t be with you tonight
You know my heart is by your side
I don’t want to run away but I can’t take it, I don’t understand
If I’m not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am
Is there any way that I can stay in your arms?

i was emotionally depressed the past few daze.. wen i found out tt 'he went overseas..
cuz i dint know Anything abt it.. where he went.. with whom.. but i prayed hard it wasnt bangkok.. cuz tt was the place we went for our 2 trips.. i shouldnt be feeling this way.. why am i feeling this way?? i hate it.. its even affecting my werk.. the very next day i went to werk my junior ask me if something was bothering me.. .. i don know howta reply her....

at the reunion dinner..
my aunty said.. seems lyk we're missing 2 guys at the table.. where's fabian? i at a loss as to wad to reply.. cuz i myself don even know.. i was resisting not to call n ask his mum de.. but i really need to know.. if not i'd neva haf a peace of mind.. finally i plucked up the courage to call on my way walking home from my grandma hse.. she said 'he went bangkok.. tt's y tears stung my eyes so badly no matter how hard i tried to control dem they just wun listen..
i was tinking where he went.. with whom?? argh how i hate tt kinda feeling.. dint he went to eat d mee i lurve? din he stayed at the same hotel lyk we did? fu*k don wanner go tink abt any of these anymore..

it hurts me to cee my grandma upset cuz she really hen teng wo.. wen i was lil n was notti & she caned me i wud stand at d window n pout.. den aft a while she wud cum n sayang me le..
grandma was upset bcuz 2 of my aunts dint turn up.. tink they had some kinda quarrel or something.. grandma's eyes were red wen i entered her room.. no matter wad i say she also seem so sad.. haiz

todae 1/2m-130pm stoopid time lor.. woke up tis morning my throat feeling betta le.. thks to the 2 bottles of honey i got myself from JP.. but my nose wanna drop out liao lor.. my flu ah.. *sneezzeees* *ahh cheww!* went to Junction 8 todae.. wanted to get muh Red Earth stuff from my fren cuz got 50% ma.. den she not wking dere.. transferred to another outlet le but the nice gal gave me d same priviledges also! keke =x spend a lil fortune just at the shop. xD got muh eyebrows plucked dere also. nice nice liao. hee~ brought a top at ebase & a skirt at taka lucky todae's Pay Day! wee~if not how to survive man! no la i wanner plan fer my next trip de.. so i can buy lots & lotsa tings.. wanner go Hongkong or Taipei leh.. carol my last time de pushcart de boss tell me there can do alot of shopping! she even treat me to Ding Tai Fung.. d food not bad.. but too x le la.. once in a while stil okay.. keke.. tok abt my work & her business.. after which i took d mrt to orchard.. wanted to get some stuffs to pamper myself but dint really c anything tt caught my eyes leh.. was suppose to haf dinner with kang wei at fish & co. de.. but he hadta werk so dint had any..
went to cee doctor at bt gombak.. got mc for tmr.. *snneezzzee* met herlina outside da clinic to get my 'late xmas prezzie' haha super late 1.. she dint manage to get the 1 i set my eyes on. she got me another 1 also not bad la. but i might be getting d 1 i set my eyes on de.. he continue wking aft sending me home to rest..

i wasnt trying to say he's irritating in my previous entry.. just tt i wud prefer to haf a good talk instead of he coming head-front lidat.. all those who knows me well enuff knows i Never bother to explain wen im not in the wrong..

i tink im not needed anymore..
gotta go rest now..